Life

It's been a long time since I wrote here.  There's been a great deal of change in my life.  I've remarried to the right woman, she's wonderful, funny, goofy and totally passionate about me.  I love her very much and our life together.  Thing is, I have nothing material anymore, but I'm happier than I've ever been.  Don't get me wrong, I would love to have the funds to buy a new guitar, things for my wife, etc., but I am not as focused on that aspect of life as I used to be.  Life is more real now than it ever has been.

Will try to add more in a little.

Kodiak-bound again…

Well, heading to Kodiak for the 2009 Rural Providers Conference.  Hope the weather holds, it can be really wet out there this time of the year.  Maybe I’ll see some old friends, we’ll see I guess.

Still waiting to find out where Junior will be laid to rest, I hope it’s Ft. Rich, he should have military honors.

Raining and blowing today, this does not bode well for travel tomorrow.  Here’s hoping it improves.

 

My son, Elijah

Then there are times like these...

Gave my heart to someone...fully...unconditionally...totally committed...and had my heart and my feelings dashed like they never mattered.  I thought I knew her....I thought I was in the "right place"...there is nothing that will make you feel like an old fool then not seeing it coming...life is so unfair sometimes...

Pain...man, I'm tired of it!

Q'uo

The absence of Summer

Well, summer was non-existant. I believe you could count the "summer days" on one hand. Fall was early, and looking out at the snow on the ground at this very moment brings about an involuntary shudder. I can't believe winter has already started!



Just found out one of my favorite guitarists has passed away. Jeff Healey succumbed to cancer at 41 years of age. What a loss, the man could really play!



The turmoil, drama and controversy surrounding my employment continues, albeit slightly more muted. I've been able to lead my first tour of the PLP site, fittingly, it was my village touring. Things on that end of my life have been progressing. I'm learning more about the "art" of stakeholder relations (thanks to Heidis tutelage) and being able to put this stuff into practice is fulfilling. I am still very much enjoying this job.



We've had a stomach virus sweep the village. It knocked down 16 people in one night. In a village of 50, that's a huge hit. All because someone sick thoughtlessly kept contact with the rest of the community instead of staying home and recovering. Issued a memo that should deal with it.



Busy couple of months coming up for me. Traveling to Anchorage for AFN next week, then to Saskatoon, Saskatchawan for a Canadian Aborgininal Minerals Association conference. Should be very interesting. December is the Bureau of Indian Affairs Service Providers Conference in Anchorage, along with BBNCs Leadership Workshop. Whew!



Q'uo

Life

How ya living life? Enjoying your loved ones? Taking time to smell the fireweed? I am. Finally. Life has taken on a new flavor for me in the last couple of weeks. I'm home. Alone. Nancy and Elijah are in Albuquerque spending time with my mother in law, Barb. Bob, my father in law, was taken from us far to quickly on the 30th of May. He fell from a ladder, causing immense damage to his body, and slipped away 30 hours later. I was the only one who could not make it for the funeral or grieving process. That in it's self was a big emotional hurdle for me. How do I say good bye? Am I wrong not to be there? I know what he would say, but still I have this nagging guilt about not being there with my family.

I have a huge amount of respect for the man Bob was. The way he prioritized his life, putting his family first and always making the time to "be there" was, and still is, a source of inspiration to me. This is what I need to do. I guess it's kind of a wakeup call for me. Life moves to fast to be totally focused on what's around the next corner, I need to be "here and now".

So, yeah...I miss Bob. Still having a hard time going through the pictures I have of our last trip to see them. I do cherish the memories I have though. Bob in bunny ears at Easter is one of them. Or quietly watching TV with Holly asleep on his lap. He was quite a guy. A man's man, yet...a man with a huge heart and the capacity to love without reservation those around him. Robert Dean Ostby was truly a great man.

Good bye Dad, I will truly miss you.

Love,

Kevin

Mexican Riviera

This is the tail-end of a month-long trip, culminating in an 8 day cruise to the Mexican Riviera. We are in San Diego as I write, having just debarked a few hours ago, tomorrow we head for the frigid climes we call home.

Zihuatenejo harbor

Carnival Spirit - Zihuatenejo

Me! (Zihuatenejo)

Ixtapa - Dorado Pacifico


Approaching Zihuatenejo

Manzanillo Harbor - industrial!


Manzanillo sunset

Leaving Manzanillo


Leaving Manzanillo

Cabo San Lucas


Cabo San Lucas

Cabo San Lucas


Cruise ships anchored Cabo

Towel Elephant!


Acapulco

Nancy in hot tub - Acapulco


Elijah on the waterslide

Acapulco at night


Cabo San Lucas

Elijah on the Lido Deck - first day


Elijah on the first formal night

Acapulco harbor


Acapulco pier

Vacation!

Well...here we are in Albuquerque, having arrived two weeks ago, I think I'm finally relaxing! We head for San Diego and a 9 day cruise to Mexico in about a week, then back to the grindstone. I'll try to do a bit more journaling in the near future, but have included a video from home and will upload some photos in the next few days.

Wind down...

I'm in Anchorage until Tuesday, got some meetings tomorrow, and then home until AFN. Fortunately, Nancy is able to be with me here...it makes the time away much easier.

Had a wonderful dinner at Trefon and Gwins this evening. She prepared a seafood chowder that was to die for! (I don't use that cliche' lightly!) Good food, good conversation.

The fallout from the HB 134 hearings continues, not as much as I'd expected, but we'll see how things are after Fairbanks.

I've included some photos from the past month or so.

The Newhalen River

Wind and wave action

Laddy & Glenda

Quo

HB 134

Salutations! I'm in Iliamna preparing for the HB 134 hearing tomorrow. I came down early to help site staff get things ready, and to be available for whatever information I can share about the bill.

In case you haven't heard of it, HB 134 is a bill created primarily to stop the Pebble prospect from becoming a mine. However, the proposed "salmon reserve" encompasses most of Bristol Bay, including all of Iliamna Lake. Once in place, the act would ensure that there would not be any further development within the "reserve", regardless of it's nature. No new bridges, docks, business structures, or even trails through the lands and woods surrounding your village.

Nice, huh?

The sponsors of the bill are attempting to stop the mine using a tactic akin to killing a mosquito with a shotgun. The consideration for those tribes and communities within the propose area is non-existent. We'll be forever burdened with life in a game reserve, but the sponsor will have kept his campaign promise!

Ridiculous.

Sooo...we sally forth, hopeful that folks understand what is occurring, and silently imploring them to speak their hearts.

Wheee...the fun never ends!

Q'uo

Hmm

Uhh..............anybody see August??

Six in Five

Well. It's been an interesting week. We started out in Wasilla, the next night was in Anchorage, then the following day we flew in to Pedro Bay, back to Anchorage, then we headed down to Dillingham. Next was a day trip to Naknek, then back to Dillingham. "We" refers to myself and two senior employees and two consultants from NDM, and we were holding informational meetings in the listed locations.

Most of the presentations went halfway decent, but the ones in Dillingham were trying. The same tired agenda of those whose job it is to mislead and misdirect was being presented as "questions", and the hostile and literally rude attitude of many of the people attending the shareholder informational was beyond even what I envisioned. However, there were folks in attendance who were genuinely interested in learning about what was happening with the project, and what information was available.

If anything, it showed me that I could deal with whatever was thrown my way, because regardless of where I go, it's not possible for it be worse then Dillingham.

*sigh*

And so it goes.

Q'uo

Life Changes

I've recently started a new job with Northern Dynasty Mines as a Community Associate, and I'm loving it! My duties include traveling to Nondalton, Newhalen, Iliamna, Kokhanok, Port Alsworth, Koliganek, Dillingham, and of course, Pedro Bay, listening to the people, and forwarding information. The necessity of interacting with stakeholders and community members is tailor-made for me, I relish the opportunity to be a part of history in the making. Some of the job is going to be difficult, especially when faced with those who are emphatically and passionately opposed to any kind of development whatsoever. However, I believe that a healthy environment, such as the one surrounding this event, cannot be without equal participation on both sides.

I've included a couple of photos taken from my trip to Kokhanok a couple of days ago.

Q'uo

Tours

I just finished a tour of the Pogo mine site, and it was an experience to say the least. To begin with, the mine is 85 miles south of Fairbanks on the Richardson Highway, and that's just the gate. The actual mine is another 50 miles inland on a gravel road that meanders around and over many hills and streams.

The camp and processing area was carved out of the side of a mountain, and the mine was bored into the side of a mountain. Part of the tour was actually going down inside the mountain, and I gotta tell ya, it's nowhere near as "glamorous" as depicted in the movies! I don't know how those guys can work inside that mountain for 12 hours a day, it would drive me bonkers! All in all it was very informative and interesting, I've included a few pictures I took.

Q'uo

Back in the Saddle......Again!

Well, Nancy and I finished our trip to the lower 48, the conferences went well, and it was nice to see her family. Nancy's sister surprised her by showing up for Nancy's birthday. Nice trip, but it's good to be home. We both missed Elijah immensely.

Received someones first attempt at posting a derogatory comment on my blog. I say "someone" because this individual posted anonymously, which hardly surprises me. Unbeknownst to them, I'm not only aware of who the sad little person, but why they did it. It's kind of disheartening to be exposed to such raw hatred, but when your life amounts to nothing but bitterness and animosity to everyone around you, the likelihood of that perverse attitude infringing on the lives of normal people is almost a given. I have to admit that my first reaction was to post the comment and respond in kind, but I'm sure that hiding behind a screen, smugly secure in their electronic anonymity, lurks a pathetic soul yearning to just be loved. So, smile...Jesus loves you!

Have a wonderful day!

Q'uo

Another plane ride...

Well, I'm here in Anchorage again. This time for an ANICWA conference at the Millenium. It was a beautiful flight, kinda made me forget the blizzard we endured the last couple of days. Anyway.


Took this shot from 11,400 feet as we passed Pedro Bay (it's on the left side of the photo. That's Augustine Island in the background, and you can just see the steam plume streaming. Cool, huh?


Q'uo

Life In The Fast Lane (sure to make you lose your mind)

Salutations dear ones. I won't even begin to sample the veritable plethora of reasons why you haven't seen me in a 'coons age. Suffice it to say, I've been busy! I gave up my seat on the BBNA Exec board to spend more time at home, but it seems like my travel has increased, a fact that my wife is prone to relate at the proverbial drop of the hat. All being said and done though, I feel more "worth" in what I'm doing now, so I guess there's that...

Downtown with Legislature Bldg.

Speaking of my shy bride, she's ensconced in Dillingham until Friday for a CHAP forum. Those of you who understand that acronym know what, how, and why. The rest of you, never mind. LOL...just a joke.

Yep.

Oh well...

The Channel & Douglas Island

What is the deal with a REAL winter?? I can't believe it's STILL cold, and the forecast seems to be leaning towards more of the same! I keep waiting for the other soggy, muddy boot to drop, but it isn't happening...just when you thought you had things figured out....

It was a very interesting trip to Juneau this past week. I'm beginning to understand more of the workings and goings on down there, and let me tell you...it's enlightening! It's probably not a good thing, but I kinda enjoyed the experience. Will probably be heading back down there again in a couple of weeks. I'll try to post some of the pictures I took in the next few days.

Rm 322 Baranof Hotel

Anywho!

Good to be back! :-)

Q'uo

Tis the season..

One of my Pedro Bay Christmas memories is gathering at the Council Building to go Christmas caroling around the village. It was a very COLD evening. I can't recall how many degrees below zero but it was very nippy and there was a lot of snow. It looked and felt like it was going to be a white and wintry Christmas. We finished singing and as I walked home I thought the air felt warmer. When I got home I watched my thermometer needle move quickly to the right as the temperature increased from -20 to +40 in a very short time. Instead of a white Christmas, it was a very slushy, mushy and wet one. But a merry Christmas just the same.

Roz Goodman

In 2004, we were in the process of finishing our new house. We still had bare plywood floors, but we wanted to have the feel of the Christmas season. We went out and cut a tree and put it in the living room right in front of the big windows on the bare floor. Besides decorating the tree, we strung lights outside from the edge of the porch. Then being able to enjoy the Christmas program put on by the kids, under Nancy's direction, at the church, having the Christmas carolers come, and topping it off with Christmas dinner with Marge and Carl, made it one of the most memorable Christmas's ever. Being able to enjoy festivities with other people who share the true meaning of Christmas, our Savior’s birth, is a great memory.

Jerry and Karen Pippen

Back in the “Good Old Days”. of course those days are only “good” to those who remember them that way, the radio was pumping out a song titled “Davy Crockett, King of the Wild Frontier” Most of us kids here in the village walked around singing the song at the top of our lungs. I believe none of us had any idea who this fella was but the words and melody was very catchy! Well it so happened that my sisters were working out in Anchorage that winter and caught the Davy Crockett fever also! As Christmas day dawned I went downstairs to see if I had gotten my new pair of jeans or perhaps a new shirt from Santa. Lo and behold! I had a number of gifts under the tree! That Christmas I received a Davy Crockett Jacket with fringe, a coon skin cap and a Davy Crockett air gun. The wild frontier of Pedro Bay had a new king!!!!!

John Foss

One of my best memories of Christmas in Pedro Bay was way back in grade school when Irene Carlson was my teacher. She had previously been overseas to China (I believe) and brought back all these amazing thin papers and a book on Origami. We spent a lot of time making ornaments from that book. She had us make beautiful ornaments, as we made placemats for the community potluck and all kinds of neat decorations, she reassured each and every one of us, that ours was truly the most beautiful she had ever seen. As we made stuff, she would tell us about Christmas and what it meant in other places around the world. She made sure that the cooks made goodies for us to snack on, and sometimes that was cake and juice, or we would have a taffy pull. The school smelled of glue and glitter, cake and kool-aide, and her talking in that very authoritative, but caring voice. She made me believe in Christmas traditions and the meaning of Christmas, but to also appreciate that there are other cultures that have equally important traditions as my own. She brought in special goodies on occasion, and slipped me a candy when I thought I was the only one getting one. I often wonder if she was slipping candies to everyone else and we all thought we were the only ones! It truly makes me smile. She made that Christmas and many more very special and memorable in my young life, and I will always remember that.

Karla Jensen


One of my most favorite, most memorable Christmas's would have to be...when we had gotten back from Anchorage, after Autumn was born. Because, we had a Christmas that was truly amazing. It was not just some "regular" Christmas get together, it was a memory that will always be with me, no matter where or what happens. It was Christmas morning; I came running out all excited, at like 6 am in the morning. I ran into my parent’s room, and flew onto their bed like a bird freed from prison bars. I tried to wake them up, my dad was still asleep. My mom (Karla), woke up and told me to go back to sleep, saying it was too early. "but mom? it’s Christmas!" she told me that I needed to go back to bed, and that we would open presents later. Daddy was awake by then, so he got up, Mommy got the baby (Autumn), and we all headed out to open Christmas gifts. I will never forget that b-e-a-u-t-I-f-u-l little smile that was on Autumn's face as she opened her presents. I remember exactly what she looked like, exactly what she smelled like, and exactly what she did. She was in her cute little PJ's...and she smelled of warm milk...and stinky diapers...lol...she was sitting on the floor watching us open gifts, and when we put a present in front of her, she just looked at us. as if she was saying "what am I supposed to do again?"...it was the funniest little thing ever, watching her stare go from us to the gift. After we had opened Christmas presents, she used to have this little chair that was in the shape of a yellow car, it had small toys attached to it. And it was on springs, so she could jump up and down as much as her little feet would let her...lol...she would do that for hours, it was always so cute to watch her. Her little legs just pushing off the floor, with a smile on her face that was just so adorable. She was so cute, that it just made me want to eat her up and dip her in my coffee....lol....she also had a swing, that was attached to the ceiling, it was like bungee jumping, it had bungee cords connected to it, so when she jumped it would make her fly all over the place. I remember sitting on the floor, opening presents, in my red and green PJ's...they were made of fleece, so they were really itchy...lol...but I wore them anyways..because they were also REALLY warm at night. Just seeing that HUGE smile on her face was like opening a door to a room filled with diamonds...but seeing her little smile was even better then diamonds. I always loved to kiss her little tiny cheeks, they were so soft. she was just the most adorable little thing ever! lol..she still is, but now she is 7 years old. and just a mischief little thing..naw, just kidding...lol..thats my most memorable Christmas ever..MERRY CHRISTMAS YA'LL!!!!!!!!!!:D

Chelsea Jensen-Roehl

My favorite Christmas was last year (2005), we had a nice tree, there were lots of presents and we got to go ice skating.

Autumn Jensen-Roehl

Turbulence

I've had some hairy flights in small planes. Some shaky ones in jet airliners as well. I've even survived a crash. But today, I got nervous for the first time in a loooonnng time.

After the plane picked me up, we stopped in Nondalton for 5 passengers, then in Iliamna for 3 more.

After taking off, the pilot started climbing for a higher altitude, hoping to get above the low clouds and gusty winds. Well, we did...eventually. At around 6000 feet we hit some of the most violent turbulence I've ever had the misfortune to experience. There was a lot of sudden updrafts, followed by massive downdrafts. My cranium had many intimate encounters with the roof of the cabin, none of which were enjoyable. We were all being thrown around the cabin like rag dolls for only 20 seconds, but it felt like 20 minutes. One second the nose is pointed at the sky and the plane is climbing like a lovesick angel, the next moment it's plunging to earth in a 75 degree angle. There was one lady who really thought we were goners, and the noises she was making are probably going to give me nightmares tonight!

However, we made it, and the remainder of the flight was relatively smooth and uneventful. Life is nothing without adventure, but I think that there's a lot to be said for the staid and predictable!

By the way, the picture above is my Mom (on the left) and Roz Goodman at our annual Thankgiving potluck. Even though most of the residents were out of town, we still had a great turn-out!

Q'uo

Departures

We're nearing the end of the "traveling period", that block of time from September to December when BIA conferences, trainings, and other related "out of town" events are occurring. There is still an exodus of people today and this weekend heading out for the BIA Service Providers Conference in Anchorage. The only thing I dread about these trips is the increased number of people in Anchorage during this time.

These folks are there for the conferences and holiday shopping. That means bigger crowds in the stores (and you all know how much I love the carnage that is holiday shopping) and on the roads. The stores are one thing, but having more people on the road makes me cranky. There's always some bozo thinking he (or she) is the protege of Mario Andretti, and that gaining the extra five seconds of time weaving through traffic to make it to the head of the lane for the stoplight is going to have a profound effect on the rest of their day. The near misses and lane cutoffs are usually punctuated by my horn, which unfortunately sounds like a muffled sneeze and usually has no effect on the transgressor. I have considered changing my horn, but the idea of mounting a 150 decibel truck horn in our PT Cruiser did not sit well with my wife so I'm left with the obligatory (and according to her, mandatory) defensive driving that I'm so fond of. (NOT)

*Sigh*

Guess I better go pack.

Q'uo

Thankful

When I'm standing outside on an evening like this, looking at that sunset, breathing in the cold air, hearing only the occasional ATV or voice break the silence, I'm truly thankful. I'm thankful for my salvation, the wonderful gift of life He gave me.

I'm thankful for the wonderful wife He blessed me with and the beautiful son she gave me.

I'm thankful for my parents and the way they raised me. I'm thankful for the village in which I live, and the people who live here. My life ain't bad. It's not what you have that counts.

There are times when I feel overworked, or when I feel stressed out, and it isthose times that I tend to forget just how good I have it. It doesn't matter that the weather is completely unpredictable. It doesn't matter that I won't be able to go on vacation when I want to, or travel to Anchorage as much as I'd like. What matters most, are the two precious souls waiting for me at home. If it was just my faith, and those two, life would still be good. It's not what we have, but then again, maybe it is.

Q'uo